Divorced // Relationship Status

Single. Dating. Engaged. Married.…Single Again. Married Again.Or maybe just “It’s Complicated.” No matter your relationship status, it can be complex, confusing, and stressful.Fortunately, our relationship status isn’t what truly defines us.  And everyone – from the dating couple to the newly single person to those married for decades– can benefit from the hope, healing, and wholeness God’s perspective provides.This message series ,“RELATIONSHIP STATUS,” is a genuine DON’T MISS as we examine how to apply Christ-like wisdom and truth in our lives, no matter our status.

Divorced

If you have been divorced, the first thing you need to know you is you are thoroughly loved by God and by us.

The first gift God gave the human race was marriage.
Genesis 2:23-4

But sin came into the garden and tried to un-one man and woman, and it’s been happening ever since.

Why does One turn back into Two?

Marriage is complicated.
Divorce is even more complicated and hard.

Do everything in your power to save your marriage.
This is a wise choice because the ripples of divorce never stop.

If this is where you are, and you are a sincere Jesus-follower, then you’ll want to know what God says.
Here we go…

God hates divorce.

“I hate divorce,” says the God of Israel. God-of-the-Angel-Armies says, “I hate the violent dismembering of the ‘one flesh’ of marriage.” So watch yourselves. Don’t let your guard down. Don’t cheat.
Malachi 2:16

He hates divorce because he loves people.
But there is no “scarlet letter” in God’s Kingdom.

Throughout the centuries God has made some generous accommodations for his dearly loved creations living in our fallen and broken world.

Some Pharisees came and tried to trap him with this question: “Should a man be allowed to divorce his wife for just any reason?”  “Haven’t you read the Scriptures?” Jesus replied. “They record that from the beginning ‘God made them male and female.’” And he said, “‘This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’ Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together.” “Then why did Moses say in the law that a man could give his wife a written notice of divorce and send her away?” they asked.  Jesus replied, “Moses permitted divorce only as a concession to your hard hearts, but it was not what God had originally intended. And I tell you this, whoever divorces his wife and marries someone else commits adultery—unless his wife has been unfaithful.” Jesus’ disciples then said to him, “If this is the case, it is better not to marry!” “Not everyone can accept this statement,” Jesus said. “Only those whom God helps. Some are born as eunuchs, some have been made eunuchs by others, and some choose not to marry for the sake of the Kingdom of Heaven. Let anyone accept this who can.” 
Matthew 19:3-12

Jesus freaked the disciples out - and maybe you, too!

From the beginning, God’s laws and perspective have always been for our good.
In spite of his accommodations for salvation’s sake, he urges us all through his Word to do the wise thing, which is always for our good.

Many of us have not been able to accomplish God’s original goal.
But God is the Redeemer of all things. Grace is the word.

You are still his masterpiece, created to do great things.
Ephesians 2:32

You can move through divorce with grace.
Build your daily strength through your relationship with Christ.

 Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. II Corinthians 12:9

You can move through divorce with grace:

Deal with you. Bring all the pieces of your own brokenness.

Embrace grieving, forgiveness, and surrender.

It is a process, not a checklist.

Gain and practice wisdom.

Value and honor co-parenting.

Remember, marriage is complicated.
Divorce is more complicated.
Remarriage is a new kind of hard.
Time is your friend.

Run to God, not from him.

Your story is not over. You are seen, loved, and valued more than you can imagine.
Don’t put down the pen while God is still writing.